What is Domestic Violence?
Domestic violence is a pattern of coercive and assaultive behaviors used to gain power and control over a former or current intimate partner. Types of abuse can include physical, emotional/verbal, and sexual abuse. Not all abusers use the same tactics, and tactics can change and get worse over time. While physical violence is frightening and can be lethal, emotional/verbal abuse is the most common type, and often the most harmful.
Being abusive is a CHOICE by an individual. The abuser makes a conscious choice to abuse his/her intimate partner. Nothing “makes” a person become abusive. It is not caused by lack of money, alcohol, drugs, unemployment, stress, or mental illness. When a person abuses, IT IS A CHOICE.
About 1 in 4 women & 1 in 10 men
have experienced some form of
domestic violence in their lifetime.
What does domestic violence look like?
Physical Violence/Abuse
Hitting, kicking, slapping, shoving, pinching
Strangulation, smothering, burning
Destroying property, throwing and/or breaking things
Hurting/killing pets
Denying medical care/medicine
Leaving a victim in an unsafe place
Not letting the victim leave
Emotional/Verbal Abuse
Shifting blame onto the victim for the abuse
Name-calling, putdowns, degradation
Manipulation, threats, intimidation, coercion
Excessive jealousy
Isolation, minimization
Blackmailing
Sexual Violence/Abuse
Forcing the victim to do any sexual act that they do not want to do
Rape, attempting to rape
Making the victim afraid to refuse sex
Forcing the victim to have sex with other people
Denying or sabotaging contraception
Threatening to share intimate photos/information
Financial Abuse
Not allowing the victim to have control of their own finances
Not allowing victims to work or forcing them to work and taking their money
Opening accounts in the victim’s name without permission
Purposely sabotaging the victim’s credit
What can you do?
Inform yourself
Where can you go for help? What are your resources?
Keep important documents
or a copy of important documents in a safe and accessible place.
Come up with a code
word with your safe person in case of emergency. This will alert your safe person to call law enforcement in case you can’t.
Identify safe places
in your community like police stations, churches, and shelters. It’s important to know where to go should you need help.
Safety plan
with someone you trust.
Inform a safe person
(family, friend, coworker) about what is going on.
Have an emergency bag
packed in case you need to leave quickly.
Have a plan
to keep your kids safe in case of emergency.
Common Red Flags of Domestic Violence Abusers:
Wants the relationships to move quickly
Doesn’t honor partner’s boundaries
Excessively jealous
Accuses partner of cheating
Says one thing and does another
Seems “too good to be true”
Has an entitlement belief/attitude
Center for Survivors
advocates are available
to help you with
free and confidential services!
Call 402-564-2155 or 1-800-658-4482
We are available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.